A mirror to how toxic relation ship affect our mental well being and how self regulation helps in inter personal conflicts.
Conflicts in toxic relationships can be neverending trauma. Free yourself from toxic people and choose to leave such relationships. Prioritise yourself and your self-care above anything. Self-regulation needs a lot of work on yourself. Self-regulation needs a lot of self-love and self-respect.
Sometimes we get lost in the words used. Sometimes we focus too much on the tone expressed. We missed those crucial non-verbal cues and by noticing them could actually stop yourself from escalating the conflict. Self-regulation happens when there is a balance in your internal and external environment.
Your inner critic appears when there is a lack of self-regulation. That inner critic is going to remind you of all the times you failed and all the things you lack. When that happens, observe your inner critic, do not try to shoo it away. Instead of fighting against, stop choosing to let it consume you.
And finally, change the pattern of your responses. If it is not working, it needs change. When the conflicts happen, focus on yourself. What are you feeling? How are you going to do about that feeling? Work on how you are going to respond. If you want a pause, take that pause. If you want to sleep on it, don’t be hesitant to do it. Self-regulation also involves taking a pause to observe yourself.